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Bird Droppings #7: Sour grapes, Softballs, Hoodies, and Prison

It’s Tuesday, and that means that means I’m hitting your screen with a big pile of Bird Droppings!…factoids, snippets and rants from around the Falcons camp and the rest of the NFL.  This weeks edition is going to be particularly dedicated to the New Orleans Saints and their wonderful fans.  A nicer bunch of folks you couldn’t find…in San Quentin prison.  The big bag of tools from Nawlins had a lot to say this past week, so we’ll just flip them the bird!

I posted a column this week about Curtis Lofton and his decision to jump ship to the sinking schooner that is the Saints.  Apparently the “Who-Dat” nation took exception to it, and decided to voice their displeasure.  One highly intelligent fan stated, “So you dirty birds like when you sign former Saints, but when we Who-Dats sign a Falcon you don’t like it. I’m calling sour grapes on this one.”  No, we just don’t like liars and cheaters…which is why we don’t like him, or you.  

Meanwhile, Saints head coach (for now) Sean Payton has decided to appeal his year-long suspension by NFL commissioner Rodger Goodell.  He also wants to get clarification on what contact he can, and can’t have with the Saints team.  OK Sean, what part of “suspended” is hard for you to understand? You can’t coach the team, not even on Madden 12.

I’m wondering if Sean Payton has contacted University of Georgia head coach Mark Richt to ask advice on how to open a season without any players.  

Falcons head coach Mike Smith stated definitively this week that both Sam Baker and Peria Jerry will not only be on the roster when camp opens, but will be able to compete for starting jobs.  (OK, I’ll wait for you to get up off the floor before I continue….)  These guys are like a couple of big oily zits that just wont pop.  This sounds to me like a bit of denial.  Are we that scared to admit that a couple of our recent high round draft picks just aren’t the guys we thought they were?  Good news is, I’ll be able to make Baker/Jerry jokes for at least six more months.  Writers love it when someone just softballs material over.

The big switch by the NFL from Reebok apparel to Nike apparel is underway, with the new Nike uniforms being unveiled this morning.  What does this mean? You get to pay even more for your jerseys and shirts for one thing.  I wonder if Bill Belichick is going to be putting up all his scissored Reebok hoodies on Ebay now?

NFL commissioner Roger Goodell has given the Saints the green light to hire Bill Parcells for the season if they want to.  Meanwhile, the Saints assistant coaches and coordinators have openly expressed their displeasure at the possibility of Parcells being brought it.  Parcells himself still denies that he’s even been asked to take the job.  Sean Payton is just looking for a way to ensure himself a little job security.  Let’s face it, if the Saints were to pull of some sort of miracle season…(Hang on.  Gagging. Be right back)…with Parcells at the helm, Payton could still slip back into his old job.  But if one of the current assistants were to guide the Saints to a stunning season, then why bother bringing Payton and his stigma back?

The Falcons have now set their sights on the upcoming NFL draft, and everyone who can have a crayon strapped into their hand and be prodded into twitching is trying to write a mock draft.  Bottom line…as the first and most of the second rounds scroll by on draft day, Falcons fans just need to keep thinking “Julio Jones…Julio Jones…”  After that the Falcons have a lot of needs to fill, and will undoubtedly be looking at a cast of also-rans – with a few hidden gems – to fill them. 

Left tackles, linebackers, defensive backs, centers, tight ends…all positions the Falcons need to seriously look at during the draft.  Draft day is going to be like bellying up to the smorgasbord and then being told…”pick three items, and you can’t come back for seconds”  Oh wait, we did get that extra 7th round compensatory pick…the closest the Falcons have been to getting “Mr. Irrelevant” 

Another nugget sent over to me from ‘Aints fans, “There might be three [Falcons fans] in the whole universe,but there are plenty of die hard saints fans. the entire city of New Orleans lives and breathes the saints we couldn’t live without them.”  (I left grammar and punctuation just the way this genius posted it).   Entire city couldn’t live without them? Hmmm….then how do you explain this?

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Michael Collins is a contributor to the Grits Blitz Blog. Visit his website Georgia Sports Craze. You can follow him on Twitter @GaSportsCraze.


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